A friend of mine turned the big 4-0 the other day. It’s a tricky number 40. At 20 you have your whole life ahead of you and 30 still seems full of possibilities no matter how much you’ve stuffed things up so far. But at 40 you feel like you need to have crossed a few things off your to-do list. At this point it’s good to remind yourself what you HAVE achieved. To take a step back and look how far you’ve come.

Adjusting to getting older is Temperance card territory. So I want to celebrate forty things that are great about being 40.

1. You know who you are.
2. You know what you want.
3. You’re not afraid to ask for it.
4. You’re also not afraid to use the word ‘no’ when required.
5. You’ve found your ‘tribe’.
6. You know who to turn to for advice.
7. You’ve learnt how to cook at least a few decent meals.
8. You don’t need to look good to feel good.
9. You don’t put up with shit anymore.
10. You’ve made your peace with the past.
11. You know how to dress to look your best.
12. You’ve found the hairstyle that suits you.
13. You’ve done some things you’re really proud of by now.
14. You have your own home be it rented or mortgaged.
15. You’re confident enough to go out and pick up if you want to.
16. You’re confident enough to demand that sex is good for you too.
17. You don’t need to rely on your looks to get what you want.
18. Bank managers aren’t so scary.
19. Your parents aren’t so scary.
20. You’re more thankful for what your parents did do than angry at what they didn’t.
21. You don’t need any more friends.
22. But if you meet someone who you’d like to friend you’re not afraid to ask them over for a cuppa.
23. You know that life’s too short to work for a shitty boss.
24. You know that if you fall others will catch you.
25. You know how to be a good friend.
26. You value your health and take better care of yourself.
27. You’re not afraid to ask for help.
28. You’re not afraid to accept help.
29. You know where to buy a bloody decent cup of coffee.
30. You know how to make a bloody decent cup of tea.
31. You treasure your time with friends (because it’s so hard to catch up now what with everyone being busy with families and careers etc.)
32. You treasure the little things – a weekend sleep in, a cuddle on the couch – because you’ve weathered a few storms by now. Known hard times.
33. You don’t care so much about how much you weigh or your dress size.
34. You’ve learnt life isn’t about being happy but feeling satisfied with your lot. And you feel satisfied with your lot.
35. You’ve learnt that it doesn’t matter whether your house is tidy or not when your friends come over.
36. You’ve found a way to contribute to society that makes you feel good about yourself even if it’s ‘just’ being an attentive parent.
37. You know how to limit your time with difficult relatives.
38. But you don’t mind your difficult relatives so much because your appreciation of family has grown.
39. You’ve learnt to accept love in whatever shape or form it is offered.
40. Have I mentioned: You know who you are.

Are you in your forties? What do you think is great about them?