My eyes are red and swollen.

I couldn’t stop bawling yesterday.

A beloved character in a TV show died.

Clearly, an over-reaction.

So what happened exactly?

Despite terrible reviews, I’m a big fan of the apocalyptic Netflix show, ‘The Rain’. In the penultimate episode of the entire series, my favourite character, Martin, bit the dust.

He reminded me a lot of my last boyfriend.

Six of Cups: Remembering happy times

Only better!

Knight of Cups: The ideal man

However, my mini-breakdown wasn’t about the character on tv, or even the old boyfriend.

It was about this..

• 

• 

The Fool + Two of Cups: The possibility of relationship

I was distressed that his partner lost the chance to grow old with him.

Which was a reflection of my distress at not having a life partner like him myself.

This is a classic example of this card…

Three of Swords: Opening old wounds

For no good reason, I felt consumed by grief.

Five of Cups: Crying over what you’ve lost, despite the good things in your life

The Three of Swords comes up when you’re reminded of a loss.

Even though you’ve done this…

Eight of Cups: Well and truly moved on

In fact, you feel like this…

Nine of Pentacles: Very content with your life

We all carry wounds in our hearts.

The longer we’ve lived, the more knives to the chest we’ve experienced.

People we’ve loved and lost.

Times when we were hurt deeply.

The important thing is not to be over-whelmed by these injuries.

Not to do this…

King of Cups Reversed: Drown your sorrows

Or this…

Six of Cups Reversed: Lose yourself in nostalgia or fantasy

Or even this…

The Moon Reversed: Succumb to a drug fuelled haze.

We have to keep moving forwards.

Carrying our secret griefs.

Using them to remind us to do this..

Judgement: Show compassion to one another

Always!